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The Letter 'I' (2005)

Laughing and crying is living and dying in the dance that my soul has to follow. Mastering the emotional spectrum is hard for a man. The plan - I'll do it tomorrow... By then, I should have some time... To try and hit rewind... Reliving my mistakes and my sorrow. I don't have a clue what I'm doing... Or who the fuck I'm currently using... When it's all over? I bet I'm at par though...

Whatever life needs from me, I do not have. I follow demons as they clear a path.

We've become friends; I understand wrath. I'm a prime number who is so bad at math.

Add it all up and what do you have? One lesson above all others that I've learned to be true; It's time to hit the road when friends and family don't believe in you.

It's time to up the dosage when depression climbs in my rear-view. It's time to be a man and put these lessons to good use. Learning lessons you don't apply to living means life becomes a ruse.


I really need to find a muse... That excuse always works the best.

Never think about the ones you hurt.

Meanwhile, my life's a FUCKING MESS! The Problem? I fantasize about showing the world who I am... Reality? I AM SO FUCKING STRESSED!

The Prognosis? I give everything I have, and it's still not enough... Diagnosis? I AM SO FUCKING DEPRESSED!

The Solution? You guys can stay here and figure it out, Let me know how it goes, cause I left...

Okay, that wasn't right... But I'm all out of fight...

I just don't fucking care at all. I'll never be a fool for a woman again, (I'll be acting the fool by night fall.)


Amber was the color of my energy. I cheated once, so I could leave, and it was cowardly.

The tough will get tougher when the going gets going, Life is fucking me up and the pace isn't slowing. Is this really the penance I'll pay just for hoeing? This is really not worth all the lawns I've been mowing... Or white linens I lay on while seeds I'm out sewing. Is it just me, has the pace started growing? Why can't I say no to hair pulling and moaning? The only thing that I know; I'm good at not knowing. When to stop doing drugs until my highs overflowing.

That line we don't cross I am constantly toe-ing. I miss the old color of my energy. You would smile when you could see and feel my synergy. Now I'm sitting all alone and it's well after 3. As I'm reliving all the shitty things I did to thee. Doctor said I'd feel much better, if I take 2 of these. Being chemically imbalanced is the last thing that I need. I swear if there's a Krytonite that's affecting me, It's a sundress, during summer, on a blonde beauty. That's the sight on seen, bringing men like me to knees. Thats the prescription that I need! No matter how bad that it seems... The trick to turning my depression, into a warm sub-tropics breeze...

Already lost without you and you're out of my reach. I can be Bi-Polar if I need to switch leagues...

We already know if you're out of my league... The only thing that it means is you're well within reach.

And it is right about the time when all the other guys flee.

That your friends take a look at me and tell you to heed. But I am just a man, if you cut me I bleed. But I am the FUCKING MAN - (just in case you can't read) I tried living my life in situations so dim,

Because I thought I could fly, before learning to swim. I am the reason my friends don't come around. My destiny is being the only Pisces who drowns. That's why my ego allows me to fly, It's Hyperbole saying I'm a regular guy. That's why I live like I have a death wish. I managed to drown even though I'm a fish! There's a whole other me that has ceased to exist, My mast had a list so I had to jump ship. That was right about the time that Joseph stalked and killed Joe. Morphing me from 'Joe the 3rd' to Joseph 3.0 This is the very best version that I feel I can be. I can feel the luck and charm inside of version three. This time I will not flirt with her, if that's what this needs. I just don't understand monogamy when we could be three. I just don't understand the argument if you could see what I see... From my vantage point, I need to be better. Or there is no us! 'We' don't have forever! It's a slippery slope that we're walking together, Just hear me out, what if 'wet' could be 'wetter?'

Whoa, that's a strong word - I don't ever use 'never' That's how two acting as 'we' Becomes one, as in 'I' And my life turns into one letter.

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